Garfield's Word of Wisdom

Garfield's words of wisdom: " we all get heavier as we go older because there's a lot more info in our heads.So I'm not FAT! I'm just really intelligent & my head couldn't hold anymore so it started filling up the rest of me! That's my story and I am sticking to it!"

Animal Kingdom

One day, there was a lion who called for a meeting with the animals. He said, “Each of you will tell a joke. But everyone must laugh or I’ll eat the one who told the joke.”
       The monkey, who knew he was very funny, went up first and told his joke. When he reached the punchline, everyone cracked up. Everyone that is, except one animal: The turtle. He didn’t laugh.
       The lion shook his head. He pounced on the monkey and ate him in one gulp. All the animals gasped. The lion called out, “Next!”
       The parrot believed he was really funny so he stepped in front and told his joke. When he reached his punchline, all the animals laughed. Except the turtle!
       And to everyone’s horror, the lion gobbled up the parrot.
       All the animals were angry at the turtle! But they couldn’t say anything in front of the lion.
       “Next!” the lion said.
       The giraffe stepped up, trembling. He started telling his joke when the turtle began to laugh really hard!
       The animals looked at him wondering what he was doing.
       The lion asked the turtle, “What’s wrong with you? Giraffe hasn’t reached his punchline yet!”
       The turtle said, “Haha! I can’t help it. The monkey’s joke was sooooo funny!